Fade or Burn

Chapter 18

Where Forgetfulness Finds Me

We drove in absolute silence. I texted Damiano to help me with dinner while discussing the show at the same time. Raindrops streamed down the glass. I was starting to get tired of this weather, and it annoyed me because I used to adore the rain. Even in the car, I could hear the wind howling outside, the drops grew bigger and more frequent, my heart began to slow down in search of its usual rhythm, but my brain screamed at me about fatigue, sending signals throughout my body, making me feel weak.

And so, when the wipers could no longer keep up with the raindrops, we stopped. I looked up at Leo to understand what was happening. He hit the steering wheel with both hands and threw his head back.

— What happened? — I asked. The guy shifted his gaze to me and sympathetically explained:

— The road is closed, — he unbuckled his seatbelt. — We'll have to walk, it's only two blocks, are you okay? Can you handle it?

— Of course, — I reassured him, though I wasn't thrilled about such a prospect. — But the rain…

— Don't worry about that: I have an umbrella, — Leo interrupted me and turned back to grab it from the back seat. At that moment, he was so close that my heart began to race again, but I deliberately ignored it. Instead, I huddled deeper into my seat and blinked, turning my gaze to the window, just trying not to notice that my cheek was almost touching his hair. When I reached for the handle to get out, De Vil protested:

— Don't even think about it. Stay put, — I submissively placed my hand on my knee and waited for Leo to get out of the car, open the black umbrella, and cross to the other side to open the door for me and offer his hand, and then I leaned on his palm and stepped out of the car.

It was pouring so heavily that I was afraid to take a single step, as I was barely holding myself up, but the blond caught me and ordered again:

— Hold on to me, — I carefully took his arm, and he smiled just a little, trying not to show his satisfaction. — We wouldn't want you to fall, would we?

— But that would be funny, wouldn't it? — I asked.

— I'd watch a falling star, — he smiled in response.

Leo's light hair got a bit wet, making him seem even more attractive, and I tried to remind myself that I didn't need a relationship, but with every passing minute in his presence, that confidence faded away.

— Do you have anthropophobia? — De Vil finally asked.

— Not exactly, — I replied with some reluctance: I didn't really want to discuss such personal topics with him. — I don't have a panic fear of crowds, I just start to get really nervous, and it makes me feel bad.

— So you love solitude and peace? — I raised my eyebrows in question,

— “but peace is a substitute for happiness,” — Leo sighed and looked at me with curiosity.

— Isn't that Jane Austen? — he asked.

— Yes… That's her, — I splashed through the puddles, subconsciously bidding farewell to yet another pair of shoes.

— “Persuasion”? — the guy clarified.

— How do you know? — I didn't think the blond would turn out to be a fan of romance novels.

— I read a lot, — Leo explained. — You might be surprised, but I prefer classics, especially Jane Austen.

— I was surprised even before you mentioned the classics, — I assured him, and my words made him smile.

— Never met men who read romance novels? — Leo squinted cheekily.

— Never met men who admit to reading romance novels, — I looked directly into De Vil's eyes, and he finally averted his gaze from me.

— What's your favorite novel? — the guy asked. He clearly wanted to continue the conversation.

— Are we still talking about Jane Austen? — I asked for clarification.

— Yes.

— Then, of course, “Pride and Prejudice,” — I was literally crazy about that book, its pocket version was even in my bag right now.

— So maybe you, like Elizabeth Bennet, will eventually stop hating me and fall in love? — I didn't know how serious that question was.

— Don't dream it, blondie, — I let go of his hand and stepped out into the rain. Maybe adrenaline mixed with anger at his confidence was coursing through my veins. But I feared that he might be right.

My face was instantly washed by the water, and the rain embraced me in its cold arms. Water poured from my hair and clothes, and a smile played on my face. But my bliss was interrupted by Leo's voice chasing after me:

— Have you lost your mind? You're going to get sick, come under the umbrella, — he got even closer, his voice growing louder. — Adele, come here quickly! — a light laugh escaped my lips, and my eyes sparkled with the moment.

Raindrops flowed down my cheeks, and I wanted to scream from how much I was enjoying this moment. Fatigue faded into the background, and random passersby didn't even notice me: they rushed to hide from the downpour. For a moment, I stopped, and I was immediately pressed against something hard and wet.

— You’re crazy! — Leo declared.

— If this is madness, then yes, — he scoffed in response.

We stood under the downpour just a few centimeters apart, smiling like fools. My soul felt so light, and I just wanted to forget everything and live in the moment. Here, under this rain, and with that damn smile with dimples. I don't know how it happened, but at some restaurant nearby, music started playing, and we began to dance. Leo twirled me around, and I laughed uncontrollably. On the last note of the song, I fell into his arms. For a moment, I forgot who he was and what he was doing. He simply existed, and I was just looking for refuge in his soft embrace. We were so wet that I was really getting cold.

— You're shivering all over, let's go home, — he said it as if we lived together, and the concept of “home” was something shared between us. But for some reason, I didn't object and just nodded, still pulled towards him.